Enjoy and Bless

I wanted to record something quickly to let you know I am still here. It’s been a while since I’ve had some quiet time to sit and reflect on unschooling and write down thoughts.

It’s been 3 months since our son came home from his micro school that he was a part of. And I’d say we’re still working on figuring out our rhythm at home, but overall it’s gone a lot more smoothly than I would have expected. If you had asked me 4 or 5 months ago what it would be like if our son was home 24/7 with us, I would have been pretty overwhelmed.

God has been good providing me strength, wisdom, patience, and just a perspective to take things a day at a time. There are hard moments, hard days, but we get through them, and they pass, and then there are really good days, really fun days, life giving, joyful days.

One interesting thing I’ve learned is that my son’s nervous system and my nervous system are pretty much complete opposites, and that has been something to work through. My body likes quiet and slow and open-ended, unstructured. My son likes loud and busy and active, and really needs structure and guidelines around his day and how he spends his time. I am still working on figuring out how to approach our days in a way that supports both of our needs well. But I feel hopeful about it.

I feel that our lifestyle, our pace of life gives me the opportunity to take the time needed to understand his needs and my needs and brainstorm new ways to approach our days that can truly support both of us.

I was thinking about how this contrasts with school, where you’re constantly needing to focus on all the things. You don’t get a time to focus on one part of your learning over another. You’re expected to continue progressing in language arts and mathematics and emotional intelligence. You don’t have the choice to slow down and consider, hey, you know what? I think I need to set aside the language arts right now and really focus on math. That’s where I need strengthening. Or, you know what? Academics, those can wait for a little while, while I address some emotional health needs that I have right now.

It is truly a blessing to be able to prioritize in our lives. We have the freedom to assess and then follow through on what it seems that we need to be prioritizing and focusing on at the time.

One reason it’s been a while since I’ve shared an episode here is I’ve really been wrestling with how to best support my son’s education at home. He’s very different than my daughters. Early on in our homeschooling journey when people would say, “Wow, how do you do that? I can’t imagine homeschooling my children.” My reply would be that my daughters make it very easy. They are eager learners. They are quick learners. They genuinely made it very easy.

My son, is a different story. He is a delight. He is so fun. He brings us so much joy, but he does not want to sit down and learn to read and write.

Facing this very different scenario has raised a lot of doubts in my mind, a lot of wondering, is this, is unschooling really able to provide what my son needs to gain the skills he needs to succeed in life? Having my podcast and the episodes to return to has actually been encouraging to myself. Reminders that he doesn’t need to learn at the same pace as other children. Having the freedom to focus on his unique strengths and gifts and not just what the world says that he should be doing. And simply knowing that school is not the answer to these educational struggles, adding specific curriculum expectations, comparisons with grades, none of that is likely to encourage his growth.

The real struggle is my ability to be patient with the path that he is on. Trusting that he will learn what he needs to know when he needs to know it. But also recognizing that I have a significant role to play. In providing perhaps out of the box approaches to learning to read and write.

One exciting thought for me is having my older daughters with us in this journey. We are all unique, my 2 daughters and I. We all have very different minds and approaches to life, and I’m excited that the 3 of us can come alongside my son and each provide unique support to his learning journey. What a gift that is, that we get to focus on our family life, our relationships. Learning, exploring, together.

Enjoy and bless, right? We get to enjoy learning together and blessing one another with our unique contributions, the unique ways we see the world.

My children do their fair share of bickering and annoying each other and getting upset, but they also are so sweet to each other. Have so much fun together. It’s so fun to see the unique relationships they have with one another.

Well, that’s a little glimpse into where I’ve been, what’s been taking up my time, where my focus has been. I just wanted to record a little snippet of what’s been going on because that’s what this podcast is all about. I wanted to share our journey. The times when things are feeling amazing and I’m confident. But also sharing these times where I’ve kind of been trudging through figuring out a new flow of life where things are not super smooth and easy.

I guess that’s all for now. Thanks for being here.